Freedom
There are many benefits to marriage, which I will discuss in future posts. Freedom is not one of them. When you're single you go where you want when you want. You eat whatever, whenever. You are the sole master of your free time. You spend your money however you see fit. To use an old Seinfeld expression (albeit out of context), you are the master of your domain. Marriage changes all of that. Some guys just don't want to give up their freedom.
Excitement
Being a single guy is like going out on patrol in a combat zone every day not knowing what you will run into. Who knows what woman you'll run into and want to "get to know" better? Every subway ride or trip to Whole Foods is an opportunity for a new adventure. Every bar or party becomes a high stakes, adrenaline pumping challenge no less exciting than a twilight lion hunt on Safari in Kenya. So what if you come up empty-handed? There's always tomorrow, right?
Fantasy Quest
Every man has an image (or 2 or 3) of their ideal, fantasy babe. She often bears a remarkable resemblance to one of the latest Sports Illustrated swimsuit models, or one of the many erotic stars that make regular appearances during late night private browsing sessions. Since none of the real-life women they meet match up to their fantasy partners, some men are willing to keep looking until they find one that does. And they keep looking, and looking. As long as they hold on to their dream of finding her, they will never be able to commit to a normal, attractive, flesh and blood woman. If they do commit, they might miss their opportunity to be with fantasy Barbie.
Fear of Responsibility
With marriage comes responsibility. You don't need to be a super hero to understand that. With children comes HUGE responsibility. Now that's scary! Having a spouse these days doesn't really add much responsibility to a man's life other than fidelity (which unfortunately, for some men is too hard to handle) and visiting the in-laws (hopefully not too often). Having kids is another ballgame. A man might suddenly become the family's sole earner while expenses go through the roof. Then there's late night or early morning wake ups, diaper changes, babysitting, diaper changes, exhausted (cranky) wives, diaper changes, and diaper changes. Some men just don't want any part of it and would rather sit around in their underwear drinking beer, watching football, dreaming of their fantasy woman, and enjoying a quiet, full night's sleep.
Never Really Grew Up
Marriage and children are for responsible adults who want to share and give. A good marriage depends on sharing and giving. Being a parent is 100% giving without expecting anything in return. Children are inherently selfish. Their primary concern is to get what they want when they want. They spend their days eating, sleeping, and playing. They're not responsible for contributing anything. All they need to do is follow basic rules and instructions, and have fun. Some men never grow up and remain perpetual children... and they like it that way.
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